Mommy's out there I really need your help. I've been feeling kind of down lately and really contemplating on what to do. I love my son very much and want the best for him and hope that I am doing all I can do to help him grow and develop as he should. I know that babies develop on there own terms, granted you (we as mothers) help them to achieve what ever goal it is at that time whether it's grabbing something with their hands or sitting or crawling. However as I have been talking to random mother's (family, friends and others) I feel as if Dezi is not where he should be developmently in a physical sense. He just made 7 months old a couple of days ago. He can roll from his back to stomach (very rarely but he can. I think it's because he doesn't like being on his stomach), from stomach to back (in like a split second), hold himself up on his arms when he's on his stomach and is kind of getting how to sit on his own. He still falls and can only sit on his own for a couple of seconds. Mom's that I have been talking to have commented on why he isn't doing certain things and the sound of their voice makes me feel concerned because they feel concerned for him. Recently I have been pushing him really hard to do certain things because to other mother's he's behind ("my son/daughter was doing that already by his age, why is he not doing it?"). I know I shouldn't care what other mom's think and I have talked to Dezi's doctor about it. He said Dezi is just fine and to ignore the comments, however, it is hard. I guess I just feel as if i'm failing as a mother. That i'm not doing all that I can do to help him. If you have any "words of wisdom" or comments on how to help him or me please click on the comment link below and leave your advice. I would really appreciate it! And i'm sure Dezi would too! Thanks!
LOVE, Keli
5 comments:
Yeah, I know how you feel. You know it's funny when you become a mother, there are a lot of people who will give you advice that's wanted/unwanted. Every child is different/special and not every child is the same. If your pediatrician says he's ok, then he's ok. Milestones will not be the same for every child. I think that's hard for people to remember. Since my dad's a doctor, I just always got used to asking him for advice. Go by your instinct, if you feel like you need a second opinion, then get one. As long as you feel comforted, but I don't think I'd be as worried. My sister-in-law was really worried because her son couldn't walk by the age of one, it took him a while. Just because it takes a child a while to reach a milestone doesn't mean there is something wrong. Now if Dezi was five and not talking, then I would be worried. But, I know my sister-in-law had a similar concern with her son. Just go by what you feel is right. If you need another doctor's opinion (it may make you feel better) then get one. I hope this makes you feel a little better. Love you, MEr :o)
When Brian was a baby he didn't ever crawl. I'm not a mother but thought you might want to know that Brian didn't follow the norm either (you can judge for yourself if you think he turned out okay-hee hee). Don't let other people get you down. You give your all to that little guy and that's more important than anything else. Love ya, Cami
Hey, I say don't sweat it! I mean, Mosiah and his cousin, Ziona, were born a day apart and he was crawling far sooner than she was. Just like every womans pregnancy is different, so is every child. We've had people saying to us, "Wow, you're son is really small" but he's healthy and that's all that matters. You can encourage him if you like, but he'll only come around when he's ready and willing to. Don't force him just because people are making you feel inadequate as a mother. He's his own person and he'll come around when he's ready. I concurr with Meredith is saying that if he's like one and still not crawling, yeah, I'd be worried, but he's doing fine! And it's true, I've heard of babies who skipped the crawling stage altogher and went straight to walking. Maybe Dezi is like that! Then you can go back to those mothers and be like "So What?! My son didn't need to learn to crawl, he went straight to walking!" Haha! Don't worry and don't let other people bring you down in the time that you should be enjoying!
I remember feeling like that sometimes when Tiare was a baby. But I say to not worry about it. As long as your doctor says he's okay and healthy then you shouldn't worry so much. I think you're are doing great as a mother and helping him grow in every way. He's a healthy and happy baby. All babys develop at their own pace. Its nice to hear from other mothers what their child can do or can't do but don't let it get you down. Just know that he will get through each stage. And I don't think anything is ever at a specific month. I remember my doctor saying as long as its between these months or by this year your child is fine. Well enjoy all the little things he is doing because before you know it he'll be running all over the place. =)
Thanks for the sweet comment. I totally agree with what the others have said on here. None of my girls have reached those documented milestones either and they've all turned out ok =D
It's hard when you are around other moms that love to compete because they are so insecure about themselves or their own kids that they have to find fault with someone else's kid to make them feel better. Desi is perfect! He'll be walking and talking before you know it and then you'll wish he hadn't learned it yet!
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